Episode 10, Season 1
Title: Blue Christmas

Written by: Ian Biederman and Samantha Howard-Corbin
Directed by: Donna Deitch
Original Air Date: 10 December 2001


Description:

When a veteran cop is murdered in the line of duty, Jordan leads the police and vengeful Detective Eddy Winslow -- Max's former partner -- to a possible suspect. But after the shooter dies in police custody, Garrett must launch a coroner's investigation to see if Det. Winslow went too far while making the arrest. Also, Garret opts to forgo his annual Christmas feast with his ex-wife, Maggie and join Lily for a Thai dining experience, angering his daughter, Abby, while Trey worries if Nigel's invitation for a weekend on the ski slopes also includes a slalom under the sheets.  

Guest Stars:

Christopher Curry (Jimm Keller), Scott Michael Campbell (Off. John Hardwick), D.W. Moffett (Lt. Eddy Winslow), Cathryn de Prume (Annie Cartwright), Issac Charles Singleton Jr. (Rudy Coombs), Matthew Yang King (Dr. Young), Richard Augustine (Uniformed Officer), Thomas Christian Collins (Uniformed Cop), Kristen Wilson (Kim Watkins)
 

Random Facts:

Jill Hennessy Sings "2000 Miles" in the episode.

Goofs:

Music:

Dr. Humanity, Sly & Robbie
Sure Thing, St. Germain
Back Door Santa, Clarence Carter
Blue Christmas, Elvis Presley

Quotes:

Jordan: No, uhuh, this is coffee Eddy, ok, ground up beans and boiled water. What you’ve got there, that is a coffee drink.
Eddy: It’s a mochacino!
Jordan: I would keep your voice down if I were you.

Jordan: I said I would buy you a cup of coffee, I didn’t know you would get all foo foo on me!

Jordan: Did I miss another memo?
Garret: It started an hour ago, homicide detectives, half of city hall, the DA’s office.
Jordan: Wow, all my favorites!
Garret: Tell me about it, I think my ulcer is coming back…

Lily: …I was thinking about cooking myself this year. I found this amazing thai-fusion
website, and I thought maybe if you aren’t busy you could come over.
Garret: You know, I’d love to, I just have this standing arrangement with my ex. Dinner
with her, and my daughter and… Walter.
Lily: Walter?
Garret: Ex’s boyfriend!
Lily: oof!

Nigel: Hey, got a little taste of the old nogg…It’ll help ring in the holiday season.
Bug: It looks like baby puke!
Nigel: 180 proof baby puke… What say old mate? Now this recipe has been passed down
in my family for generations.
Bug: Along with some very disturbing genetic material!

Lily: So why are you such a scrooge?
Bug: The aluminum spruce, isn’t enough?
Lily: Christmas rocks! There’s caroling, tree trimming…
Nigel: Slipping in a little tongue under the mistletoe.

Nigel: Now, every bullet has its own unique percentage of heavy metals.
Jordan: And we all know how you love heavy metal.
Nigel: The heavier the better…

Jordan: You rock my world Nig!

Garret: Where’s Abby?
Maggie: Apparently your new ballistics tech is, er… in your daughters words… tasty!
Garret: I’ll make a note to fire him. So what’s the problem Maggie?
Maggie: Does there have to be a problem?
Garret: For you to step foot in this place, absolutely.

Garret: I’d say letting your boyfriend live rent free in the house that I paid for
demonstrates considerable flexibility… some might even call it gymnastic!

Trey: Mount Whitestone Lodge…looks nice.
Nigel: Fresh mountain air with very real possibilities of willing romantic conquests.
Trey: Ski bunnies?

Nigel: It’ll be ripping fun love, you me a little skiing and a lot of sex!

Garret: ...Bug, run every test we got…then when you’re finished with those make up a
few more…

Jordan: We started the autopsy on Combs, some of its kinda hinky, I was hoping you
might be able to explain what happened.
Eddy: You know I can’t talk to you Jordan.
Jordan: Off the record.
Eddy: You’re the ME. You are the record.

Trey: Listen, you’ve known Nigel longer than I have, is he?
Bug: What?
Trey: You know!
Bug: oh… you know I have no idea.
Trey: So he’s never come onto you?
Bug: Well, there was that one time he asked me to marry him, but I’m pretty sure that
was just business. Why do you care?
Trey: I don’t have a problem with it. It’s just, the ski weekend, the talk, he slapped my
ass
Bug: Well, maybe you were a naughty boy!
Trey: Seriously, nothing good can come of this!
Bug: You know that’s a very limited world view. Now if you were a root stalk bora
weevil homosexuality would be a very positive area to explore!
Trey: I don’t even want to know!
Bug: The females they get it on together all the time, it improves their reproductive
success
Trey: That’s great Bug, but what has it got to do with me?
Bug: The beetles, they like to watch, it puts them into such an erotic frenzy they can’t
help but join in!
Trey: But that’s two girls, two girls is a whole different thing!
Bug: Yeah…

Abby: …We can finish this lecture at Christmas dinner,… oh wait, that’s right I forgot,
you’re blowing it off…way to be responsible dad!

Jordan: What I can’t figure out, is why the police are stonewalling!
Bug: They’ve got something to hide?!

Bug: …ok, how many times have you been pulled over in the past six months?
Jordan: None.
Bug: I’ve been pulled over three times!
Jordan: No big shock Bug, I’ve driven with you…

Jordan: And I haven’t been ‘avoiding’ you.
Kim: Oh, please! We didn’t come all the way down to this nasty ass funeral home to
listen to a line of bull!
Jordan: It’s a morgue not a funeral home!
Kim: Whatever!

Kim: ...And listen, you blow us off again, I swear, I’m laying you out on one of those \
slabs.

Garret: …I also got two messages from the DA, but I’m sure he just called to chat!

Max: Something you’ll learn eventually, what’s right isn’t necessarily the truth.

Maggie: You’re the death expert. Is there such thing as justifiable homicide of a 17 year
old?
Garret: I say the smart money’s on Abby taking us both out first.

Jordan: A suspect died on your watch! What book is that in?

Garret: I play a lot of things, low stakes poker, vintage Benny Goodman records, even
the occasional game of charades when I’m drunk enough…

Eddy: Your daughter asked me a question tonight. I’ve been driving around trying to
figure out the answer.
Max: Well Jordan will do that to you.

Trey: Nigel, I gotta know what your intentions are?
Nigel: My intentions?
Trey: For us, this weekend?
Nigel: Hopefully we’re going to get lucky!
Trey: See, now that’s what I’m talking about.

Nigel: Trey, it’s freezing, I’m not going to sit here and discuss my sexual proclivities.
Now, you are my friend, you are my colleague, you are not my lover, so get on the back of the bike, please… that’s it sweetheart, now hold on to my hips and leave the driving to me!

Jordan: …You guys have real lives, and I’ve got…issues!
Kim: And we don’t?
Jordan: Lets be honest, look I love you guys, but do you really want me in a sandbox with your kids? I mean I might say something and freak them out for life!
Kim: Geez, Jordan, why does everything have to be so damn complicated with you? Nobody is perfect, and no one is asking you to be. You’re weird alright, you always have been and we were friends anyways, nothings changed.

Jordan: Shouldn’t I be smelling turkey by now?
Max: Oh, about the turkey…
Jordan: Oh, not again?!
Max: I’ve been meaning to get a new oven!
Jordan: For ten years! You want pepperoni and green peppers?
Max: Maybe with a little extra cheese? It is Christmas!

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